What is it like to be married?

      Tomorrow is my husband’s birthday and I don’t have anything planned for us to do. Should we go out for dinner? Should we go watch a movie? Or maybe a surprise party? But, my guess would be we’ll be staying in with the family.

       My husband and I have been together for almost a decade now. I’m starting to forget dates and numbers I’m suppose to remember. But, when we were dating, every time it was his birthday, I use to give him something special — an expensive gift, Cirque du Soleil tickets or a fancy dinner. Am I too lazy to make an effort now or time starts blurring away the thrill and excitement I use to feel?

        One of women’s goals is to get married. This is in fact their biggest goal in life. Yes, we want to have the best career as much as possible. But, finding a man to marry and to have kids with is part of our dreams, ever since we were little. Our biggest nightmare is to be all alone, childless with 20 cats in an old house with a smelly carpet. Unfortunately, the man of your dreams doesn’t magically appear in the most romantic scene knocking on your door and falls in love with you at first sight. It took me a long time to find my husband. And our story is nothing like the movies at all.

        The reason I was not able to prepare something special for Paul’s birthday is we all ended up catching the flu. Started with the kids then to Paul then last one was me. It was beyond terrible and disgusting — vomit and diarrhea on every inch of our place. It was so far the worst days of our lives! Good thing my husband took care of us. He bought groceries, cooked food, clean the house, took care of the laundry — he handled everything.

       What’s it like to be married? Marriage is being with someone, who is there for you even when you are sick and disgusting. Your used-to-be boyfriend is now family — a person, who genuinely cares for your well being for the rest of your life.

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Should I have kids or not?

maternity

Questions About Being a New Mother

    Is my life over? Will I be a good mother? Will my body go back to the way it was before pregnancy? How do I know that I’m ready to be a mother? These are some questions women are concerned about when they get pregnant. However, It was mostly excitement for me.

What’s it like to be pregnant and to give birth to your first baby?

      When I met my husband, I knew he was the one. He was and still is funny, crazy, talented and such an easy-going person. Our relationship moved quickly. Before you know it, I got pregnant – our very first baby together. Waiting for my baby to be born was torture. I kept counting days and felt extremely impatient to meet my very first child. Then the day has arrived when I got to hold my newborn child. Tears-of-joy poured out from my eyes. I have never felt so happy in my entire existence! I felt in-love; the kind of love I’ve never felt before. It was surreal, as if I was like dreaming. The smell of a newborn baby is amazingly sweet. I remember thinking of her like a puppy – a new pet, my new buddy and my one true precious, who I will always have in my life.

 

mommy and Scarlett
Arianne and Scarlett – 10 months old

Reasons Why Couples Wait to Have Children

      The society we live in right now is leading us into having kids later in life. A lot of couples wait the utmost last-minute before having children. Why have children now, if we can spend our lives partying for another decade? Why settle and have a family, if I can barely take care of myself? Los Angeles is an expensive city to reside in, and so, being responsible for another human being’s life will be without a doubt, costly. Although, waiting to be financially established was the suitable thing to do at the time, my mindset was not in the same boat as other couples.

I watched my parents started from scratch into bringing us into private schools, to purchasing a home, and being able to afford college tuition. This made me learn that no one will ever be ready financially to have children. Most people are not financially stable in their 20’s or even 30’s. It takes time to build a career or a business. I told my husband Paul, “let’s grow together with our kids.” Children are wonderful addition to your family not a burden in your life.

It’s Better to Start Early Than Later

       Another reason it’s better to have kids earlier than later is because it’s quicker to lose the baby weight in your twenties rather than 30’s or 40’s. As you get older, your Metabolism moves slower. Metabolism is what converts the fuel in the food we eat into the energy needed to power everything we do, from moving to thinking to growing. Moreover, when you get older your muscle mass decreases, which slows down the rate at which you burn calories. For instance, my first baby was born when I was 26 years old. There was not a problem into getting back to pre-pregnancy weight. In a matter of 3 months, I was back to size zero. I did not go to the gym or changed my diet. However, giving birth to my third baby in my early 30’s gave me an extremely hard time to lose the excess weight. My body never went back to the way it was. Although, I can’t wear my skinny-jeans anymore, I learned how to embrace my new body. Preferred looking more “womanly” rather than “model-skinny.”

       Your decision to have children, will change your life forever. There will be good and worst times. You will discover some physical, emotional and changes in your mentality. It will be a roller coaster ride starting from the day you bring your baby at home all the way through the day your child goes off to college. Lastly, being a new parent is about learning how to handle each challenge that comes your way with utmost poise and patience. And to enjoy every second of your life with your fast growing family.

References:

http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/weight-loss/expert-answers/slow-metabolism/faq-20058480